Last week, I was on a strategy call with an entrepreneur who was frustrated that he had not grown the business the way he wanted to yet.
He was overwhelmed with the thought of growing a team and hiring new people. I quickly discovered there was a conflict between growing his business and feeling guilty about being present for his family.
Guilt if he’s there and not focused on his family, and guilt if he’s not there and building the business.
This type of guilt can slow us down in BOTH relationships and our business.
He even recalled how this played out for both his dad and his grandfather. It’s a problem that has been modeled and passed down and it’s getting in the way of both his family goals and his business goals.
This is a subconscious problem. And, our subconscious runs 90% of our behaviors and decisions.
His core values, which were imprinted from his dad and grandfather, are a direct conflict with his goal to be with his family.
He wants to be a good dad and husband, and also wants a successful business. The guilt that is created by the conflict is slowing him down and affecting his decisions.
He is very smart and capable, but until the problems are addressed, they'll continue to be a problem.
There are 3 Reasons Why Business Owners, Entrepreneurs, and Professionals Never Make a Million or More in their Business, and all 3 are connected.
1. They make excuses
2. They settle for just getting by
3. Their goals don't align with their values at a subconscious level
They make excuses to themselves or others in order to help cover up the guilt that they are feeling. And, when we make excuses, it puts us in a place of not owning our results and taking responsibility. When we don’t take responsibility for our results, we don’t learn the lessons and aren’t able to move forward. We remain stuck.
Settling or Just Getting By.
I see this a lot with business owners or entrepreneurs, at one time, I did it myself. After struggling with not being where you want to be in your business, we tend to set lesser goals and just settle for where we are. There are so many amazing business owners and entrepreneurs that have the potential to do much bigger things in their businesses, yet, because they haven’t figured out how to get past the mental blocks that are holding them back, they just settle for where they are.
Their Goals Don’t Align with Their Values at a Subconscious Level
Have you ever known anyone who says they want to lose weight and get healthy yet they continue to eat pizza and cookies? Consciously, they want to lose weight, subconsciously, they get comfort (or some other positive) from the cookies and pizza. This is why they don’t stick to their goal of losing weight. They may stick to it for a little while, but then they fall back into the old behavior. The SUBCONSCIOUS mind is what drives the behavior. If it doesn’t align with their conscious goals, they will always slide back into old behavior patterns.
In order to fix this, you must get to the real problem.
Find out the why behind the behavior. Discover what you can learn from it so that you can move on from it. You will then solve the problem, your values will become aligned, and you will go into massive action and increase your success. Here is a breakdown of this process:
Identify the problem.
A lot of times the problem goes much deeper than how it is appearing. For example, when I have a client that is struggling with consistently reaching goals there is generally a much deeper reason behind it. Even though that person may try and do better in this area, they will continue to revert back. In order to solve the real problem, going deeper and asking even better questions is key. One of the questions that you can ask yourself is, “how is that a problem?” Dig deep to make sure you are addressing the real problem.
Find out what caused the problem or where it first occurred.
Sometimes the cause is obvious, sometimes it’s the littlest thing that we may have written off as very insignificant. Being told no about something, not being included in a playground game, or taking on some of our parents beliefs based on how they grew up.
The subconscious mind is a curious thing. It can be very literal and needs direct orders to follow. We have the ability to “teach” our subconscious to do the things we want it to do if we know how to direct it. “Cleaning up” past problems and changing our perceptions about them is key.
Fix the problem so that it doesn’t keep happening.
Once the problem is identified and you know what caused it, you can go into the next crucial step and fix it. We can do this by reframing it, and looking at the problem from a different perspective. When we do this, we are able to blow out the neurological boundaries so that the problem “disappears”.
At this stage of the process, we’ve created new neuropathways and we are no longer able to access that old behavior. It’s an old memory now, in the past where it should be.
If you have a problem that has been holding you back from higher levels of success and consistent action, reach out to me, I’d love to help.
To your TOTAL success,
For more education and training on having even more success, here are a few ways:
You can check out my NEW podcast, Mind for Success
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Download the FREE PDF: How One of my Clients (An Entrepreneur) went from Zero to Over $1 Million with One Shift
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